Disciple of INDYCAR Weblog

February 15, 2010

NASCAR Steps On Its Genitals For Their Biggest Show of the Year

Filed under: The Disciple Blogs — Disciple of INDYCAR @ 1:47 am

The NASCAR circus for 2010 got off to an interesting start. There is an increasingly cynical side of me that views the slower pack racing as pandering to third world-like slackjaws and not that far removed from professional wrestling. Whenever Larry McReynolds or Darrell Waltrip attempt to speak, and that happens a lot, their nearly continuous evisceration of the English language reinforces such cynicism. When Larry Mac uses words like ‘extreeee’ or phrases such as ‘sence these guys wuz own the track’ I think back to my elementary school days at St. Lawrence when nuns would whack the crap out of you for even sounding uneducated. I have a mental picture of these guys sitting in a small booth flicking boogers at the glass. Then I remind myself that I am watching NASCAR, where everything is slower.

It took over six hours to get the race in on a beautiful but chilly day. Why? Because it appears the surface has not been repaved since 1959. I hope Belskus, Bernard and crew were watching that fiasco and understand the way it has been done at IMS is the right way. IMS never lets it go more than ten years. ISC is notorious for getting by with bare minimums at their tracks and it shows when walking into one. Having the track surface break apart like that regardless of weather is inexcusable.

Congratulations, by the way, to Jamie McMurray who won the thing. That was a really nice story. Unfortunately he may not even be remembered now that Danica-mania has swept NASCAR. The Daytona 500 is their super bowl, but let’s review what happened when coverage of NASCAR’s biggest event began:

-It took less than ten minutes before the Danica-to-Cup talk began.

-The very FIRST break featured a Danica Go-Daddy spot, even though a male Go-Daddy driver sat on the pole for the 500.

-Danica was discussed before ANY current Cup stars. Before Dale Jr., before Jimmie Johnson, before Tony Stewart, before Jeff Gordon, before anyone.

-The entire first segment of the broadcast covered Danica’s day in the grand national race.

-During a red flag period (and at other times) Boogity laid out how it would be easier for the Nationwide teams to get sponsorship simply by dropping Danica’s name. Then he said (twice) that Danica would become a better Indy Car driver as a direct result of the time she spends in NASCAR. For proof he offered Dario, who came to Cup, left, then won the Indy Car championship. Yeah, DW, it HAD to be because he raced against the ‘best.’

The fact that NASCAR has always been so needlessly insecure about its identity that it always feels compelled to position itself as superior to Indy Car is telling. It has always been that way. Daytona would not have been built had Big Bill not been so heavily influenced by the grandeur of IMS.

The Danica fawning did not stop with the Fox crew. The Associated Press ran a national piece about Danica’s debut picked up in papers across the country that started with the words ‘Former IndyCar star involved in wreck midway through race.’ Huh? The piece does not indicate who wrote the piece, but whoever did should be fired for negligence. Aren’t facts supposed to be checked? Last time I looked Ms. Patrick was supposed to spend the next two years driving Indy Cars full time. Lying seems to come easily when parties suckle the NASCAR teat. Crowd figures, speed and calling those racing machines ‘stock’ cars are consistently among the most egregious.

Still, it is always great to wake up and kiss the wife on Valentine’s Day, suffer through the brunch, then watch the race. I fell asleep on the couch before the ¼ mark and woke up while they were trying to glue the track back together. What a joke. When they were actually racing it wasn’t bad. It is racing. I was hoping Smoke would do it but it was not meant to be again. It will be a while before he accomplishes what his mentor did.

I certainly wish the Indy Car season was underway.



  1. Your bitter beer face is obvious.

    Editor’s Note: Well that did not take long. Any chance for any sort of intelligent debate, or will you just be hurling barbs then running?

    Comment by TroyM — February 15, 2010 @ 1:56 am | Reply

  2. You know, I’m going to shock you again. I 1000000000% agree with everything you wrote here about NASCAR. What’s even sadder, is that some people who watch that actually believe every single solitary word of it. (Not everyone. I was tipped that some on the NASCAR.com message board weren’t happy with the WAY over-the-top coverage of the princess by the NASCAR media, and after checking it out, that is indeed the case.)

    Comment by Thesmartestguyintheroom — February 15, 2010 @ 2:23 am | Reply

  3. Dear Darrel Waltrip,

    Dario won the championship in a much more dominating fashion prior to racing in Nascar. Please make note of this. Furthermore, Mr. Waltrip, I’d like to point out that he won many more races turning right this year, than in previous years, and I don’t seem to recall your Nascar boys doing very well at that. In fact, if I had money with which to gamble, I’d probably lay a bet on Tony Stewart, Jeff Gordon, or Kyle Busch winning the next five years worth of road courses you run. Only three drivers out of forty three can turn right, but you guys are the best.

    Dear Nascar,

    Welcome to Danicamania. You can have her.

    Comment by The American Mutt — February 15, 2010 @ 3:28 am | Reply

  4. I wonder how many more times Danica Patrick will get herself stuffed into the wall and ball up her COT before she gets herself yanked out of this NASCAR Nosepicker Series abortion and back to Indy Car racing, where she belongs?

    Comment by olvidado — February 15, 2010 @ 5:01 am | Reply

  5. I think the racing itself is better than in recent years, but the track surface continues to be a joke. REAL fast cars will never be able to race on that surface as long as it stays this way, perhaps that’s partly by design. Imagine if the open wheel Danica series were to run there. Speaking of Danica, Boogity and Ah Motel You Whut can’t get enough praise in about her. That’s fine, because as long as they prop her up, the Indycar Series’ fan base may actually increase.

    Comment by MTroy — February 15, 2010 @ 10:11 am | Reply

  6. First the bad. Having your track fall apart during the biggest sprint cup race of the year is or should be humiliating. It cannot happen again. Anywhere.

    Now the good. No tears here that Danica did not finish the Nationwide Series race. It’s all about Danica and that is why she is a year away from leaving what until 2012 is open wheel racing. If things go bad she can always take her top off and make sleazy commercials. She already has the experience.

    The Best. That racing was outstanding. What a perfect example of traditional American Oval racing. Do the new IRL boys realize that you don’t have racing like that on street or road courses? Not even close. And the Nascar boys may have cars that go in the 190’s, but it makes no difference if an Indy car can hit the 230’s if its on a road course making mighty 20 mph turns. Can anyone picture the new Delta Wing car making those mighty 20mph turns. It will be a laughingstock.

    Comment by Bob F. — February 15, 2010 @ 1:45 pm | Reply

  7. The racing was the same two pack drone typical for NASCAR on these big tracks. First the low line goes to the front, then the high line. Cars making their way with “friends” or “agreements” and having to put someone in the wall is not racig to me. Having the fastest car with the best driver who accomplishes victory based on their abilities in the car and not on their handshakes in pit lane is Real American Oval Racing to me.

    NASCAR thrives on misinformation. Their massive PR machine and sponsors try to make us think their viewer demographic is a well educated, racially diverse sort. It’s the same with their hype of Danica and how they address safety issues.

    One of these days NASCAR is going to get someone killed and it may not be a driver or crew member. Showing that Edwards Talladega crash where a lady had her jaw snapped, playing it over and over as a promo spot is NASCAR in a nutshell. And their show yesterday was an abomination of racing.

    Comment by Mike Mille — February 15, 2010 @ 5:23 pm | Reply

  8. wow defender, talk about throwing stones when you live in a glass house. was it not just a few short years back when IMS resurfaced their track, and it was so bad, we ended up with tire-gate in formula one? you can try and throw blame anywhere you want to on that one defender, but fact is, it made IMS look pretty bush league that day.

    Editor’s Note: Actually, as a person who attended that event (and all the other USGPs at Indy) the company who took responsibility was Michelin. The Bridgestones had zero problems. Goodyear failed similarly due to crab-walking ‘stock’ cars. Anyone one the record is usually very complimentary of the surface at IMS, calling it the best anywhere and often comparing its smoothness to a billiard table. But if I was an idiot I might attempt to assess blame on IMS as well.

    let me also point out defender, with no malice, that i feel the same way watching irl cars running around the track, compared to CART/CCWS equipment. the irl runs at slower speeds in dumbed down, inferior equipment.

    Editor’s Note: Hmmm. You might want to double check under which sanction the track records are held. Oddly, cart/ccws died years ago. Most real racing fans have evolved.

    of course, your bias is showing in full colours yet again. what you fail to have mentioned, is the racing itself, you know, the actual product, was pretty damn good. i am not a nascar fan myself, but i do admit it was a pretty good race to watch when they were on the track.

    Editor’s Note: Hmmm. Evidently the words I wrote that said “When they were actually racing it wasn’t bad. It is racing.” eluded your tenuous grasp. But given you are probably from Canada and a cart apologist and someone who acts like he is in grade two, your inability to comprehend actual words is unsurprising.

    i have also been to IMS a few times myself defender, and will say, before you talk about the condition of ISC tracks, look at your own beloved track. the first day i was ever there, i could not believe the state it was in. the grandstands are in need of repair, they look rickety and worn down. troughs for bathrooms in the infield, for a place that claims to be state of the art? food vendors are nothing special, and the general cleanliness of the place leaves alot to be desired. just because you fawn all over the place, do not attempt to sway everyone else over to your way of thinking. not all of us are weak-minded and able to be led like dumb sheep, just like tony george did to alot you here for all those years.

    Editor’s Note: Some people get it and some people are not capable. It would be really swell if you stayed away from the sport in any form. You obviously lack the maturity to be a fan.

    take a look at your former fornicating grounds at TF one of these days john, they are eating their own young now at that place. even longtime irl supporters like doc austin are starting to see the light. sucks when everything you supported for the past 14 years is gone. Paul Ishmynob

    Editor’s Note: This May will mark the 46th time I have attended the Indianapolis 500. It has not lost any luster to me. But then again I am not some childish idiot who stupidly believes utopia was the early 1990’s. Particularly after seeing what happened in the 1960s first hand. Perhaps with a few more years you might begin to mature. But you will excuse me if I do not hold my breath.

    Comment by paul ishmynob — February 16, 2010 @ 12:18 am | Reply

  9. Too bad the crab walking had nothing to do with it. Just proves that you don’t know what you are talking about. While the car is going down the straights “sideways” the wheels are all tracking in the same direction. The rear wheels just aren’t following the front wheels. Anyone with half a brain should be able to know that cars would not be able to run on any kind of track at 150mph+ like that without chewing tires up. They were running like that at many other tracks, and didn’t chew tires up.

    Why don’t you learn what you are talking about before you go spouting off with your mouth.

    Editor’s Note: I know I could never be as brilliant as the vigilant cacklers ’round here, but I might ask just two questions: 1. Why didn’t NASCAR bring cars that went straight down a 5/8 mile straightaway, and 2. Why didn’t Goodyear build tires that worked? They do that elsewhere. But why are we jawing about that particular water under the bridge?

    Comment by TroyM — February 16, 2010 @ 1:24 am | Reply

    • Perhaps you should read up on why they set the cars up that way.

      Editor’s Note: Perhaps those who race at Indy should actually come prepared to race at Indy. Cars that raced in the Indianapolis 500 and the tires that carried them on the same track had no such problems. They came prepared. And, as an added bonus, there are/were no potholes in the IMS track. They pave the surface every ten years or so. What a novel concept.

      Comment by TroyM — February 16, 2010 @ 2:43 am | Reply

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